Dee

Aku ingin menjadi mimpi dalam tidurmu
Aku ingin menjadi sesuatu yang mungkin bisa kau rindu
Karena langkah merapuh tanpa dirimu
Karena hati tlah letih

Aku ingin sesuatu yang selalu bisa kau sadari
Aku ingin kau tau bahwa aku selalu memujamu
Tanpamu sepinya waktu merangkai hati
Tanpamu bayangmu seakan-akan

Kau seperti nyanyian dalam hatiku
Yang memanggil rinduku padamu..u.uu
seperti udara yang kuhela kau selalu ada

Hanya dirimu yang bisa membuatku tenang
Tanpa dirimu aku merasa hilang
Dan sepi………………

duh…….keren ya heheheheehe

Apa salahku padamu kali ini?
Hingga kau seperti tak punya hati
Apa salahku padamu kali ini?
Hingga kau menyiksaku tanpa henti

Kau buat aku menunggu
Kau membunuhku hari demi hari
Aku tlah jemu menunggu
Menunggu sesuatu yang tak pasti

Kau boleh saja teriak di depan mataku
Hingga kau habiskan semua amarahmu
Tapi kau sama sekali tak bersuara
Slalu mafaatkan kelemahanku oh

Jauh diujung sana, kulihat setitik cerah sinar berbentuk pelangi penuh warna
Nan indah melengkung melambangkan cerianya hidup yang penuh warna
Semakin kuberjalan ingin menggapai sebuncah kebahagiaan itu
Semakin pelangi itu bergerak menjauhiku seolah ia bukanlah untukku

Dibalik riang tawa, haruskah kusimpan sedih dan lara hatiku
Kutahu pelangi itu akan selalu bergerak menjauh,
Namun jalan itu tetap kutempuh
Seolah aku merasa bahwa suatu saat nanti pelangi itu akan berada dalam genggamanku

Perasaan itu,….perasaan sedih dan putus asaku itu,
Perasaan melihatmu dikala akan berpisah denganmu,
Semakin kuingin melihatmu, semakin kuingin menggapaimu
Semakin kau berjalan menjauhi diriku

Mengapa tak dapat kutahan saja dan berlari
Mengapa tak bisa kulihat sekelilingku dan melupakanmu
Perasaan ini sudah tak dapat kupendam lagi
Rasa sakit setiap saat mendengar suaramu, melihatmu.

Aku disini mengingat dirimu, menangis tanpa air mata
Bagai bintang tak bersinar, redup tanpa cahaya
Habis sudah perasaanku kau bawa pergi
Cintaku yang terakhir kupersembahkan hanya untuk dirimu seorang

hehehehehe….oh…sampe kapankah ku menunggumu?

YoU aRe woRth wAitInG FoR…. ^-^

Didalam sebuah cinta…terdapat bahasa
Yang mengalun indah…mengisi jiwa
merindukan kisah…kita berdua
Yang tak pernah bisa…akan terlupa

Bila Rindu ini..masih milikmu
Kuhadirkan sebuah..tanya untukmu
Harus brapa lama..aku menunggumu..
aku menunggumu…

Didalam masa indah…saat bersamamu
Yang tak pernah bisa…akan terlupa
Kenangan masa yang…menghancurkan jiwa
Dengan segenap cinta…aku bertanya

Bila Rindu ini..masih milikmu
Kuhadirkan sebuah..tanya untukmu
Harus brapa lama..aku menunggumu..
aku menunggumu..aku menunggumu…

Dalam hati kumenunggu..
Dalam hati kumenunggu..aku…
Dalam benak kumenunggu..
Dalam hati kumenunggu..aku…
masih menunggu….

Bila Rindu ini..masih milikmu…
Kuhadirkan sebuah..
harus berapa lama…Harus brapa lama…
aku menunggumu..aku menunggumu..
aku menunggu..aku menunggumu….

Big thanks to Ko David, Ko Andreas, and Ko Mario for the help and the give of the opportunity for me to be in one of the great training Microsoft held for partner.

I owe this to those big three guys for the generousity and the trust that given to me. 

I sat down from 9am to 5pm listening to Danny Condecido, a CRM Solution Specialist.  Topic for today is regarding the upgrade Microsoft does to MBS CRM V1.2 to v3.0.  and from what I conclude, Microsoft still is the one who customize and design it software to be user-friendly, and prepare for the worst.  A large change had been made, a lot of up-grading and powerful tools had been added.  I was amaze by MBS CRM, how it can help the sales cycle to be shortened, and now I can say that I am very satisfied and not dissapointed that had chosen this software to be my major of my thesis (that had been abundant :P) 

thanks to Microsoft for its update might be hang (most of the time i suppose?) but hey nothing is perfect isn’t it

A one nice English band that I ever thought have the real
voice and a meaningful lyrics. I enjoy
their songs once in a while, until a friend, came and talk about Cold Play so
much, he loves it that he bought all the Cold Play album. 

I never really have any favorite band, besides perhaps Boy
Zone. But to this band, dare I say that
they are genuine musicians. They wrote
their own song, they put all the passionate and the feeling while singing it,
and they put out their own life experience to the song. 

Chris Martin, the singer, wrote about Gwyneth, his wife,
and, Apple, his daughter with Gwen. To
prove to people that true love really exists. That there is someone who felt that love is the source of his life. Someone who really thinks love could be anything
he needs. To prove to us that we have
something to hope on for and that something won’t ever fade away if passionate
and feelings are put on effort. 

My favorite of Cold Play would be “

Till

Kingdom

Come”, and my favorite verse is

Hold my hand inside
your hands,

I need someone who
understands.

I need someone,
someone who hears,

For you, I’ve waited
all these years.

Thank you Cold Play

Blog FS ku hilang……….jadi yang ini di test,….akankah kembali blog postinganku setelah yang Mr. Right or Mr. Right now? hiiks………….

All this while I thought I know everything about you. 

Colour of your eyes, what will make you laugh, what do you eat and drink, what you like and dislike.  Until there is one day, that i realized there is a distance between us.

so wide , so deep, so far away that I can’t reach.  That’s the time when i started questioning myself, what is it I am waiting for, in this side of the hill, when there won’t be anything to bridge me along to your world.  I wonder how am I still here and I don’t want to move a thing It might change my memory.

I can’t go, but I can’t hide, I can’t close my eyes, I was so afraid that your last shadow would disappear and leave me all alone.

I looked back there is darkness, I looked up front, you are fading, starting to disappear, gone with the cold wind.

A friend once told me, I am calmer in dealing with things emotionally, and I figured all of this is because I’ve been reading bible and being closed with God, asking him what should I do and asking for stronger heart to accept the things that according to my opinion isn’t fair.  People had problem, God give us brain for us to use it to think and we did.  Problem is one of the way that we will be able to tell we still alive?  I want to share some verse that I find very inspiring for me. 

I pray that my family, friends, you, and all is given everything they want, in the will capacity of it.  I pray that i will have this strong heart everytime i face problems.  Being angry is tiring.  but believing is giving.

Mat 17:20

Ia berkata kepada mereka:"Karena kamu kurang percaya.  Sebab Aku berkata kepadamu: sesungguhnya sekira kamu mempunyai iman sebesar biji sesawi saja kamu dapat berkata kepada gunung ini: Pindah dari tempat ini ke sana, maka gunung ini akan pindah, dan takkan ada yang mustahil bagimu.

Mat 21:22

dan apa saja yang kau minta dalam doa dengan penuh kepercayaan, kamu akan menerimanya.

Mat 23:12

dan barangsipa merendahkan diri, ia akan ditinggikan.

Mat 24:13

tetapi orang yang tahan sampai pada kesudahannya akan selamat.

Mzm 5:9

Tuhan tuntunlah aku dalam keadilan-Mu karena seteruku;ratakanlah jalan-Mu didepanku.

Mzm 7:18

aku hendak bersyukur kepada Tuhan karena keadilan-Nya dan bermazmur bagi nama Tuhan yang Mahatinggi.

Mzm 9:21

biarlah mereka menjadi takut, ya Tuhan, sehingga bangsa-bangsa itu mengakui, bahwa mereka manusia saja.

Mzm 38:33

jangan tinggalkan aku, ya Tuhan, Allahku, janganlah jauh dari padaku!

What’s denial?

If u know the truth, but afraid to live with that, and chose to be something you know it’s wrong, that’s denial.

According to www.wikipedia.com ‘Denial is a psychological defense mechanism in which a person faced with a fact that is uncomfortable or painful to accept rejects it instead, insisting that it is not true despite what may be overwhelming evidence. The subject may deny the reality of the unpleasant fact altogether (simple denial), admit the fact but deny its seriousness (minimisation) or admit both the fact and seriousness but deny responsibility (transference). The concept of denial is particularly important to the study of addiction’

Let me fresh you with an example.

If u r gay, or lesbian, and the community aren’t welcome of that, u r afraid to live with that, refused the fact, and tried to live in a denial, having a girlfriend to be with and share with, when you don’t feel the real love, you onlyfeel her warmth, and comfort with, like being with a bestfriend for the whole life. Then u live in denial.

If u love someone, learns that he doesn’t love you, but afraid to imagine how is life without him, pretend to be happy and live a life just as his friend when inside your heart you know you are dying for something else, then u live in a denial.

I do live in denial.  I’ve been living in this denial forever that i forgot the taste of the real world.

I’m trying to be more positive and receive the fact, when i realized that living in a denial is living in your own dream, your fantasy.  So beautiful that I can’t find my way out.  I still live in that denial.  I don’t know until when, but I do know it isn’t real.

The rainbow always curve beautifully, till the rain comes and sweep its beauty away off this world.